NOTE: I am usually a passionate believer that it’s “gummi” instead of “gummy,” but this time I’m going with the spelling on the packaging.
There I was, being driven by my stepfather Paul from the Minnesota airport to my mom’s cabin in Wisconsin. Paul asked if my wife and I needed to stop for anything, but we assured him that we were fine.
The billboard was for Grundhofen’s, a shop that specialized in bratwurst. Including, as the sign proudly proclaimed, the world famous GUMMY BEAR BRAT.
When you see a billboard like this, here are your available options:
1. Stop and get a gummy bear brat.
There are no other available options. So we pulled off the highway and went to Hugo, Minnesota. I fully expected this to be a fake-out, like when I got “spaghetti and meatballs ice cream” that turned out to just be regular ice cream in the shape of spaghetti and meatballs. I figured it would just be a vaguely bratwurst-shaped gummy candy. Nope. In the same way that you’d have a jalapeno brat, they indeed had gummy bear brats.
The dark spots in the picture are gummy bears mixed with the meat:
They were only available in packs of six, which is a pretty big commitment for something where you expect to take a bite and go “Bleeaaarrrrgh!” but what was I going to do, not get a gummy bear brat? They also had other weird-ass flavors like Skittles and Grape Kool-Aid, but there was no need for this expedition to get out of control. Here I am, standing proudly with my purchase.
And so we arrived at the cabin. My mom did not seem as enamored by the idea of the gummy bear brats as everybody else, but we threw ’em on the grill, one each for me, Paul, and my wife Lynne Hansen, who may not want a website link in this particular case.
The gummy bear brats are the ones in the middle. You know you’re hungry.
And so we ate them. They were………..not as weird as I thought. The gummy bears completely melt on the grill, so you’ve basically got regular brats with small sugary pockets. I’m not saying it tasted normal, but there was no need to bleargh and, ultimately, they were completely consumed with a bit of shame but no gastrointestinal distress.
Will I have gummy bear brats again? No, because I only got them in the first place so I could post about it on Facebook and Twitter. But if you’re ever in the vicinity of Hugo, and your tummy is rumbling, maybe you’ll make the same choice I did.