Candy Thoughts


Best Candy: Haribo Gummi Bears and Red Vines.

Best Candy Bar: Cadbury Fruit & Nut Bar and Twix.

Worst Candy: Whoppers. I assume that the strawberry milkshake ones are even worse but I’ve never tried them. Also Brachs Milk Chocolate Stars.

Best Candy That I Can’t Get Anymore: Sour Starburst and Chewy Tart-n-Tinys.

Candy That My Sister Told Incorrectly People I Only Said Was One Of My Favorites Because Nobody Else Liked It And That Way I Didn’t Have To Share: Raisinets.

Candies That I Only Like In Their Gourmet Forms: Gummi bears and jelly jeans. These are not inherently good. They’re only good if they’re Haribo or Jelly Bellies.

Beloved Candies From My Childhood That They Ruined: Tangy Taffy and Good n’ Fruity. Why did they need to add sprinkles to Tangy Taffy? And why did they have to turn Good n’ Fruity into jelly beans?

Candy That I Soooooooo Looked Forward To Because Of Its Ad Campaign But It Turned Out To Not Be All That Great: Bonkers.

Candy That I Used To Love, Haven’t Had In Decades, And Would Probably Be Underwhelmed By Today: Chuckles.

Candy That Was Part of a Christmas Collection That I Got Every Year And Never Liked: Butter Rum Life Savers. 

Candy That I Didn’t Like As A Kid But Like As An Adult: Almond Joy.

Candy That Somehow Continues To Exist Beyond All Common Decency: Chocolate covered pretzels.

Most Overrated Candy: M&Ms. They’re fine, but c’mon.

Candy That I No Longer Eat Because It Would Yank Out My Fillings: Bit-o-Honey.

Best Flavor Addition: Blue raspberry Sweet Tarts.

Candy Whose Eating Process Has Never Been Entirely Clear: Those wax soda bottles. Do you chew on them and spit out the wax? Do you bite off the tip and drink the liquid inside?

Favorite Piece of Candy Trivia: Three Musketeers bars used to actually come with three bars: strawberry, vanilla, and chocolate.

How Many Licks Does It Take To Get To The Center of a Tootsie Pop? It depends on the length and intensity of the licks.

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