Many people say to me “Gosh, Jeff, your books are sure swell, but can you act?”

I always chuckle and say “Yes, indeed I can,” because no evidence exists either way, so why not lie?

But now YOU can be the judge. Because I have a 15-second role in THE UH-OH SHOW, the new film from legendary splatter director Herschell (BLOOD FEAST) Gordon (2000 MANIACS) Lewis (THE GORE GORE GIRLS). I’m not saying that my role (spoiler: I die) is the greatest part of the movie, nor am I saying that it is the standard by which all future 15-second roles will be judged, but I’m not denying that, either.

Order your copy from Amazon right here!

First Mobile Post

Yes, this update is not only being posted on my IPad, but I’m posting from Panera (“Where free wireless means that you will never, ever get a seat inside”). The sky is darkening and it’s going to be a race to finish my turkey sandwich before the thunderstorm begins. I probably won’t do many mobile updates, because they encourage me to share things like how I’m trying to finish a turkey sandwich before a thunderstorm, but it’s nice to have the option.

Angry Birds Has Not Sucked Away My Life

Of course, I don’t have Angry Birds on my iPad, and will not be getting it, leaving me free to continue to write novels and stuff. I did, however, get a game called Hector: Badge of Carnage, which is an adventure game in the style of those 80’s-90’s games with the ridiculous puzzles that I loved so dearly, which have been pretty much replaced by hidden object games. Oh, I like hidden object games, don’t get me wrong, but they’re no Day of the Tentacle / Full Throttle / Grim Fandango / Monkey Island / Broken Sword / Freddy Pharkas: Frontier Pharmacist / The Longest Journey etc.

To demonstrate the amazing movie-watching power of this new device, I watched an episode of Mystery Science Theatre 3000 featuring a grainy black-and-white film and finally finished watching Troll 2, which I’ve been watching in 10-minute increments over the past few months. Worst movie ever? If you exclude Birdemic: Shock and Terror, I was inclined to agree until the very last scene. However, I maintain that the final moment of Troll 2 is so dark and twisted that it removes the film from Worst Movie Ever consideration. Sorry.

I still haven’t seen Best Worst Movie, the Troll 2 documentary, because these days I’ve become a slave to Netflix Instant Watch.

Now I’m Posting With Power!!!

Yes, I’m posting this website update with my new iPad2. Now I can consume media like never before!

THE MONSTER’S CORNER Multi-City Book Launch

The Monster’s Corner, an anthology of stories from the monster’s point of view (and including my own tale “Specimen 313,” which those of you in the United States can download absolutely FREE right here), goes on sale September 27th, and to celebrate, I’ll be doing a booksigning at…

Barnes & Noble  # 2767
11802 N. Dale Mabry Highway
Tampa, FL 33618

Don’t live in Florida but want to be part of the fun? There are going to be signings all over the country, so if you can’t make it to mine, keep watching this space for more updates!

Bloody War Between Interviewer and Interviewee

Sometimes interviewers ask polite questions, and sometimes interviewees give polite answers.
Other times…things get ugly.


This charming photograph with me and Sally Bosco is somehow related to the fourth Andrew Mayhem novel…

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